There are a lot of things to learn..
how to speak
how to behave
how to show that I'm angry with the constant reminder to show it in the least angered manner, speak in the least angry tone...
I feel constrained...
Its just like... You need to fart.. but because of the environment, the people around, you have to try all means to hold it back... and even you are successful, you wouldn't feel good because the gas stored inside is making you feel funny and bloated...
This is exactly how I feel...
Though its not a good feeling, you just have to do it...
Because this is how it works...
because you have to be considerate for the people around you...
because simply, we can't always be the way we want to be, can we?
So then... the only way is to find a secret place..
find a corner where no one is there and then....
WOALA! let go as much as you want.
But hey... do not be too happy yet...
because there is always a chance where you find someone passing by...
but then again, this person can only blame him/herself for being so unlucky
well.. of course there are also times where you just cannot control and then off you go...
letting out in front of everyone...
Though its unintentionally... you'll still get criticized at, laughed at etc...
So at the end of the day.. you would have learn something... and that is...
DUN FART! Do so only when you are alone in the room...
A hundred and one wrong things I've done...
Its so difficult to be me.
How I wish I can duplicate myself so that I have another me who knows me inside out...
another me to comfort, encourage me.. and an angel to guide me through.
well, at least let it come true in my dreams.